This is probably going to be a bit of update/catch all kind of post as there are a few things that I have on my mind or need to get off my chest as apart from my psychologist I have no other outlet that will listen and won’t make me feel bad for my thoughts and/or feelings.
Now that is out of the way on we go. I called this post Goal Setting Badger because I kind of set some goals for myself this year and actually wrote them down. I don’t usually like to set goals for myself as I never keep them but in the diary that I bought for the year there was a section for goal setting so thought that I would put a couple down. They are:
- Get Married
- Lose Weight
- Write More/Start Writing Book
Now the first one has been on the cards for a while though if the Eagle doesn’t start helping out more it might not go ahead as money and the fact that most of my family doesn’t think I should marry him anyway and tells me so, my mother on a daily basis, which raises my anxiety and depression levels. He is also not helping himself with his moods and general attitude.
The second one is for myself and a little for wedding and I have already begun. I have been exercising since the beginning of the year and I have adjusted my diet so that I am eating approx. 1200 a day. I might not look it but due to my height I am considered obese and I needed to do something about it. So I did. It is working so far but that may change because apparently it my responsibility to make sure that my mother eats properly and with the diet most of my weekly budget goes on the food I need for the week. This of course makes me feel guilty and of course that raises my anxiety and depression levels.
Now the last one is all for myself and is probably going to be hardest as finding the time and energy to do so will be a challenge of itself. I would be happy enough to blog a little more actually but writing a book is my ultimate goal/dream for myself. Hopefully this will not cause any anxiety or depression but knowing me I will find a way.
In the last week and a bit I have done two, well let’s say three things that I haven’t done in a while or never done before. The first one was my birthday present from the Eagle last year, which he bitched about buying because of price and the fact that it was something that he was not interested in himself (I half expected him to pull out actually, luckily I had a backup plan) despite that it was my birthday present and something that I wanted. It was also a bit of a bucket list item for me. It being seeing my current favourite band in concert. That band is Florence and the Machine. It was first concert I have seen in a long time and the first outdoor concert I have attended. I loved it, though admittedly they didn’t play enough songs from the first two albums but I understand why they didn’t.
The next thing I did was groom a dog and I don’t mean just brushing one. I shaved a dog that was not my own. The Eagle and I bought a electric razor to groom our Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Lady, as she absolutely hates the heat and we have been grooming her ourselves for a couple of months now. My mother happened to tell a lady she knows this and asked that we do her dog as well. The Eagle was not comfortable doing it but mum offered up myself with assistance from her to do it. Luckily we did a pretty good job and the lady was happy with our efforts.
The last and final thing I did was go fishing. It is not something that I do often or even enjoy doing, actually I don’t consider myself to have any of what I call fish sense. The Eagle and I were invited to go by my sister and her sometimes bf and although the Eagle was not super keen I talked him into it as it was something to do and was inexpensive as the sometime bf was bringing the bait and was paying for lunch. All we had to do was bring some fishing rods, which luckily we had. It ended up being alright despite having no fish sense and the unhealthy lunch (KFC).
Oh and I also dyed my hair violet.
Song Of The Day
P.S bet you thought it was going to be Florence and the Machine!!