I have officially moved over to another department of the company I work for. I am still trying to find my feet to an extent mainly because I have not been given any real direction of what I am supposed to be doing here. I am just doing what I can with what I have been given really. Luckily there are few familiar faces so I am probably not as anxious as I could be considering I do not like change all that much.
On the home front my sister is in hospital (again) and the more that she uses the more gets violent. She assaulted her sometimes partner last week so much so that he needed to go to the hospital. My mother and the Eagle are sort of fighting at the moment and of course that puts me in a difficult position as I can see the point from both sides, ever the fence sitter that I am.
I have sorted out my ceremonial music (yay!!) but am still tinkering with reception music, well the entrance, first dance, cake cutting, last dance/departure that kind of thing. Not sure if am going to have a daddy/daughter mother/son dance as well as the Eagle is not a dancer and I am not sure whether or not I want to dance with my step-father or not. Not even sure I want to walk down the aisle with him. Might do a Meghan Markle and walk on my own or have my mother do it. Was considering my Uncle as he is also my god-father but my mother and the Eagle thought that was a silly idea.
Though I thought I had the ceremony/reception worked out I might not have now. My mother says the reception venue is too far away from where the ceremony is. I have done a google check on this and it is only 23 minutes while both my mother and the Eagle say it is around 40. So I have to find a venue that will do the meal the way that I want it closer. Might have found one too but it is a little more expensive and without alcohol but I still have negotiate that. The whole backyard BBQ may still be on the table though, fingers crossed.
My dress and shoes have been ordered along with a tiara. Was not originally going to have one but I liked Meghan Markle’s so much that I decided to find a cheap one that was in a similar style. Have also changed my mind in regards to the bridal party dresses. I have also ordered the ties for two of the groomsmen but am worried as I have not received them as yet despite ordering them quite a while ago. I have contacted the seller 3 times but have not had a response from them. I paid for them through PayPal and also contacted them also in the hope that I get my money back.
Song Of The Day
If I was all over the place last time around I definitely am now. My anxiety won’t settle and neither will the headaches. Actually the headaches are becoming a pain in the neck, both literally and figuratively. I am also not sleeping the best which is not helping on iota. The heat is also playing its part..
The Eagle celebrated a milestone birthday over the weekend and it was another thing that I was anxious about as I was not sure that he would like the gift that he was getting from myself and his mother. It is a cruise and since he is not fond of boats I was a little worried that he would reject it outright. He was pretty okay with it as he said that he needs to loosen up and try new things and we will take the necessary medications and such so that we both will not get sea sick.
We also went out to dinner with friends of ours that night which was a nice change. We don’t get out and do things like that all the much and though we keep saying we need to do it more often we never do. I am always the one that ends up making the arrangements anyway as he just leaves it up to me and the others don’t seem to try.
The Eagle is also considering learning to ride a motorbike which means, and he has admitted to it, that he is heading into a midlife crisis. I am not sure how I feel about that yet as I have mixed feelings about it. His sister is a rider and one of couples that we had dinner with are as well and I think that was the reason why he mentioned it.
Well the wedding preparations have fallen through a little as we can no longer hold the reception at my brother’s house as he does not believe that his land is flat enough to do it after speaking to a party planner who was doing a party at a neighbouring property. Whether or not this a true is a whole different kettle of fish as my mother, myself and the Eagle tend to think that my sister-in-law might be stirring up trouble because she does that.
Talking of my sister-in-law I had to make a change to bridal party and added her daughter as a bridesmaid. On New Year’s Eve they came over for a BBQ and I showed her the plans that I had made for the wedding. A couple of days later the Eagle got a message from my brother saying that my his daughter was upset because my junior bridesmaid had said that she was my favourite because she was in the wedding party and the other wasn’t. That didn’t sound like her at all and she said that she never said that.
On Australia Day we had another BBQ, though my sister-in-law was not present because she had to work. I spoke with my niece and asked her about it and she said that it never happened and didn’t know anything about that until a few days later when her dad asked her about it. We tend to think that her mother was bitching to my brother and he misunderstood what she said or she deliberately made up the story. Either way I then asked her if she would like to be and she said that she would. After speaking with my mother and Eagle we came up with a way that she could be a bridesmaid without adding another groomsman.
I have nailed down the processional and recessional songs now and am trying to nail down where we having the wedding since the original idea fell through. The Eagle is a partial to going to the registry office and though it is cheaper I don’t like it. Maybe it will grow one me though.
I have also decided that the bridesmaids will not have bouquets of flowers but hold lanterns instead. The junior bridesmaid will carry two red roses as she will present them to myself and Eagle when the registry is signed. The flower girl will have a posy.
Song Of The Day
I have written about my fandom loves and sporting loves but never really gotten into my musical tastes and my background when it comes to music. I don’t think that there is a person alive that can honestly say that they do not like music of some kind.
I love music, always have. In high school I was in the school band and choir and attended the Sydney School Eisteddfods a couple of times in their choir section. I played the flute and sang a little though admittedly I was not the best of playing the flute mainly cause unlike most women I do have an issue of doing two things at once, that being playing and reading music at the same time. I guess also my anxiety would rear its head even then as I was never very good a singing solo either due to nerves.
I have attended a few concerts though probably not as many as I would like to. My first concert I ever saw I believe was Salt N’ Peppa and that was with my sister and her friend and it was more for my sister than for me even though the concert was in and around my birthday. The next concert was once again for my sister and that was Madonna, the very first time that she came out to Australia. My sister was a huge fan of Madonna back then.
All other concerts that I attended have been here in Brisbane and they are:
- Coldplay (twice)
- Dave Matthews Band (twice)
- Snow Patrol
- Counting Crows
- Powderfinger (though not their farewell shows)
- The Screaming Jets
I had always wanted to see U2 in concert but I have a feeling that I won’t ever go to another concert again due to my anxiety and the fact that I now have an issue with crowds and my bf does too. I would have like to have gone to a music festival but maybe I am a little too old now though maybe if there is a good line-up maybe the Byron Bay Blues and Roots festival might be a good one to attend.
Actually there probably one gig that I would probably try to attend if they ever come to Australia again and I will drag the bf with me if I have to and that is my favourite band at the moment and that is Florence and the Machine. Actually if Florence Welch came on her own and did solo shows I would go in heartbeat. I honestly believe that she is one of the best female singers in the world right now, probably second to Adele. There is just something about her that speaks to me and I have been saying lately that she is my spirit animal/idol. We also share the same birthday, so a fellow Virgo.
I have also gone to attended a few musicals and at one stage I tried to attend one a year with my mother, that is if there was a good show playing. I have seen:
- The Lion King (twice, once in Las Vegas and once in Brisbane)
- The Producers (Brisbane)
- Wicked (Sydney)
- Chicago (twice Broadway and Brisbane)
- The Phantom of the Opera (Brisbane)
- Rock of Ages (Brisbane)
- Jesus Christ Superstar (Sydney)
- Buddy (Sydney)
- Singing in the Rain (Brisbane)
I think I have seen more than that but off the top of my head that is all I can remember. I have though been to a couple of cabaret shows one in Las Vegas while on a Contiki tour and again for a hen’s night a couple of years ago at a restaurant on the Gold Coast called Dracula’s. I have also attended a couple of Cirque Du Soleil shows
Song of the Day